The proverb–“Well begun is half done.”–recognizes that it’s good to get off to a good start. So isn’t it peculiar that marriage–what we vow is a long-term “permanent” relationship (“Till death do us part”)–begins with “falling” in love?   Why associate this most delightful state of consciousness with falling?  What good ever came from falling?  How can a relationship that starts with a fall do anything but fail?  Too soon after the rice has been thrown and the wedding cake is eaten, far too many brides and/or grooms call divorce lawyers.

Cupid is looking to put people in love.

Rational people might argue that “falling in love” is just a figure of speech.  But the subconscious mind takes the words and thoughts that we feed it literally.   So it’s high time we replace “falling” in love with “rising” in love or “growing” in love.

We have a host of expressions that don’t give love a chance.  Consider the following:

“I’m crazy about you.“

“I’m madly in love.”

“Love is blind.”

We associate love with craziness, madness and blindness.  Is it any wonder why six in 10 first marriages end in divorce?   What if we changed our expressions?

“I’m crazy about you” could become “Being with you helps put me in my right mind.”

“I’m madly in love” could morph into “Being in love frees me.”

“Love is blind” could change into “Love opens my eyes to higher realities.”

Loving another person can lead to delightful and liberating states of being, to marriage and children, and to a lifetime of commitment together. It’s high time that we give it a chance to get off to a good start by calling its early delicious stage rising in love.

Business cards are for exchanging

A business coach for massage therapists, I’m not going to tell you what to put on your business card.  Designers are far more capable with layout and graphics than I am.  I’m going to tell you how to use this card.

Let’s look at a typical place you give out this little piece of ID: a party.  You’ve given it out so often and nothing ever came of it.  You used it incorrectly.  Let’s look at a correct and enlightened use of that card.

Let’s say you’re talking to some guy at the guacamole dip.  You’ve talked about what you do and he expresses interest, so you automatically give him your card.  He now has a way to contact you–but you have no way of contacting him.  If you’re a woman in her mid-40s or older—you may remember a time before the advent of cell phones, pagers, and voicemail—when you may have sat beside the phone waiting for a certain guy on whom you had a crush to call. You felt the vulnerability of being reactive.  Now I’ll show you how to be proactive.

Change the adage “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” to  “When in America, do as the Japanese do.”  They trade business cards.  A Japanese businessman expects to receive a card from whomever he’s giving his to.  Say to the guy at the guac dip, “As for cards, I love the civilized Japanese tradition: I give you my card and you give me yours.”

Then say, “Think about if you’d like to get relief from that pain in your (insert here whatever his pain is, he’s no doubt told you and probably even showed you), and if I haven’t heard from you within a week, I can make your life easier and give you a call.  Would you like that?”

Instead of being that disempowered teenager years back, you can be an empowered adult massage therapist and call him.  I’m not saying he’ll be your client if you call.  But if you don’t, he probably won’t.

The Buddha in his Enlightenment

The Enlightenment I’m going to speak about in this blog is much more than the Enlightenment that the great French philosophers Rousseau and Voltaire wrote about in the so-called Age of Enlightenment that helped create the idealism and egalitarianism that led to the writing of the Declaration of Independence and the U.S. Constitution.  These two documents helped inspire a more enlightened way of looking at government throughout the world for decades and centuries to come.  They still do.

The Enlightenment I’m going to speak about in this blog is also more than the understanding of the Law of Attraction and Creative Thought that’s become so popular with the best-selling book and video, The Secret.  It’s also more than the understanding of New Age principles.  It’s the realization of living truths that were recorded more than 40 centuries ago.

The Enlightenment I’m going to speak about in this blog is more than the Cosmic Consciousness flashes depicted in the revolutionary book, Cosmic Consciousness, written slightly over a century ago by the Canadian psychiatrist R.M. Bucke.  In this seminal classic, a desert island read for me if I was limited to even just a handful of books, the Walt Whitman biographer voluminously revered the mystical glimpses of great seers, sages, philosophers, poets and the like throughout history.  The book is so important in the history of consciousness because the spiritual experiences that it celebrates are given greater importance than the ritual performance that takes place a couple of hours every weekend in America.

As important as all these different versions of Enlightenment are, Enlightenment is much, much more.  It’s only fitting in this age of 24/7 that Enlightenment becomes widely known as the all-time 24/7 state that it is, rather than an occasional glimpse or fleeting experience that it isn’t.  You may visit Paris as a tourist for a vacation: a Parisian on the other hand, is French.  And so it is with Enlightenment: a perpetual condition of transformed consciousness as much as it is of purified physiology.  Because it takes the transformation of the nervous system to consciously reflect for all times—all the time—the timelessness of the Transcendent that’s your essential nature, the ground of your inner Being, your true higher Self.

The 9 Muses

One of the best ways to deepen your connection to your Muse—your creative Source–is an exercise called Discovery Writing.  It taps the infinite creativity of your subconscious mind to enhance your creative output; increase income; enrich relationships; organize your life; deepen your spiritual connection, and so on.

Here’s how it works. Write one objective you want to work on at the top of the page.  Let’s say it’s “20 Things I Can Do to Increase My Income 25 Per Cent this Month.”  (If you want to double your income, then use that as a goal.)  Then, for two minutes, keep your pen moving. Set a timer.  Jot down whatever is in your mind, even if no sensible income-stimulating idea is there, never letting the pen be idle for a second.  Even if it’s seemingly off-topic like “chocolate chip cookies.” Who knows—maybe you can make money selling the cookies you bake in your spare time. (Debbi Fields sure did before she thrived as Mrs. Fields.)  Maybe you just need an occasional milk and cookies break. Your inner child might be trying to give you a tip that all work and no cookies make you a dull boy. The act of letting creative juices flow without editorial censorship opens you to provocative ideas from the Unconscious.  From this, I developed new workshop ideas, ideas for books, and names of people who could expand my work.  After two minutes, put down your pen and look at your list. If any idea appeals to your rational mind, consider acting upon it the way you’d act upon any good idea.

If you build it, he will come

 “If you build it, he will come.”—The Voice, in A Field of Dreams

Recently, while communicating on my Facebook coaching page for massage therapists (http://www.facebook.com/pages/Hillsboro-Beach-FL/Business-Coaching-for-Massage-Therapists/329153699118), an LMT in New York State asked me how to get more clients.  I asked her how many more sessions she wanted to do each week, and how much time she had for them.  She said she wanted 10 more weekly clients.  A business coach for massage therapists, I proceeded to teach her a secret for manifesting that I teach in some of my CE courses, that wasn’t mentioned in The Secret, the best-selling video and book.  In other words, you heard it here first.

Step one, I told her, was to block off time in her calendar for these 10 new clients.  In her case, what made the most sense was to add two more clients at the end of each of her five workdays, say, from 3—4 PM, and from, say, 4:15—5:15 PM.  In and of itself, that doesn’t automatically cause 10 new clients to ring her up on the phone and ask her for late afternoon appointments—at precisely the time when she wants them.  But, I told her, here’s the kicker: if no new client shows up on Monday from 3—4 PM, when you’re “expecting” him, then work on marketing your business at that time.  Since it’s already blocked off for massage, it becomes more possible for such a person to learn about you and reach out for you.  Ditto from 3—5:15 PM when there’s another open slot for such a person.

You can also use part of that blocked-off hour to do some “inner” work to help manifest such clients, such as affirmation and visualization exercises, among others.  These I’ve already explained in previous blog posts.  Build new clients into your consciousness and schedule book, and happy manifesting!

Service is everything

The Giant grocery store in Silver Spring, Maryland is unlike every other supermarket I’ve ever been in throughout the country–it lacked a customer relations department.  That’s because Giant has awakened its inner giant: it has a Solutions Center.  The difference is palpable.  Customer relations are what stores offer, solutions are what customers desire.  

Massage therapists can immeasurably benefit from this significant distinction.  LMT ads in wellness magazines, often feature just business cards plunked down in the publication.  They communicate what the LMT does, rather than what the prospective client receives.  Advertising in this way is a missed opportunity and a waste of hard-earned money.  

What LMTs need to understand is that most people wouldn’t recognize their myofacial if its release hit them in the head.  “Neuromuscular” sounds technical for someone who just wants some relief from shoulder pain. Massage therapists should conduct shop talk with other therapists, but should use plain English to clients and prospects. To paraphrase the old acronym: KIST—Keep it Simple, Therapist.

If you meet me at a party and you ask me what I do, I won’t tell you that I’m a life coach—even though that is what I do.   Instead, I’ll tell you that I help people create breakthroughs in their finances, businesses, and relationships.  In other words, I describe the results that someone can expect by working with me.  That gets people’s attention quickly. 

If I meet you at that party and I ask what you could tell me that you relieve pain from people’s bodies.  And if I’m feeling pain in mine, you can bet your sweet myofacial that you’ll have gotten my attention in the proverbial New York minute.

Wouldn’t you love owning a business where everyone wanted what you offered?  Even giants like Microsoft aren’t in demand by everyone. But there is a business desired by virtually every adult–it’s called massage therapy

That’s because everybody has a body.  And most of those bodies are in lots of pain and dis-ease.  As a business coach for massage therapists, I’ve privately worked with more than 150  LMTs, and I’ve had to take their focus from making ends meet to see the big picture—that everyone they meet can become a client. Missing this insight causes LMTs many financial struggles.

Realizing that virtually everyone wants your service makes you enthusiastic and bold.  (Enthusiasm and boldness create new clients more effectively than clever marketing.)  Tell someone at a party that you’re a massage therapist, and she’ll likely discuss the pain in her body, and you’ll likely laugh and reach for spinach dip. More confident LMTs reach for a business card.  The ones I coach ask when she’d like to come in for some relief from that pain in her body.  Landing a new client can be that simple.

That’s why it’s important to get into conversations about what you do, the second question strangers ask.  Don’t just give your card and ask her to follow up. Do what the Japanese do and get her card, too, and ask permission to call if she doesn’t call you within a week.

Warmth in communication is a delight.

We blemish our communication with white lies, big fat lies, withholds, gossip, and back-stabbing.  The following list can help you be clear and clean in your communication.

1. Honor your truth.

2. Tell the truth quickly and kindly.

3.  Ignore your neighbor’s gossip.

4. Don’t talk behind other people’s backs.

5. From time to time mirror the speech of others so that they feel heard.

6. Don’t verbally abuse others.

7. Take a brief “timeout” when you lose your temper.

8. Forgive others for being less than perfect.

 9. Speak enthusiastically.

10. Uplift people with your words.

Wouldn’t you love owning a business where everyone wanted what you offered?  Even giants like Microsoft aren’t in demand by everyone. But there is a business desired by virtually every adult–it’s called massage therapy.

That’s because everybody has a body.  And most of those bodies are in lots of pain and dis-ease.  Very few of the 150 LMTs whom I’ve privately coached recognized this when I started working with them.  The absence of this insight causes LMTs financial struggles.  Realizing that virtually everyone wants your service makes you enthusiastic and bold.  (Enthusiasm and boldness create new clients more effectively than clever marketing.) Tell someone at a party that you’re a massage therapist, and she’ll likely express interest.  At this point, many shy LMTs laugh and reach for the spinach dip.  Others, who might be a little more confident, reach for a business card.  The even wiser therapist reaches for her appointment book and asks when she’d like to come in for some relief.  Landing a new client can be that simple.

That’s why it’s important to get into conversations about what you do, the second question strangers ask.  Don’t just give your card and ask her to follow up.  Try playing a new business game, targeting one new client from your yoga class, or party.  Some consider this audacious. I don’t encourage dropping business cards everywhere, but I do encourage adopting four easy strategies:

1) Recognize that every adult is interested in relief from physical pains and/or desires deep relaxation.

2) Tell people what you do when asked; if they’re interested, wait for them to say they’d love a massage.

3) Then, take out your appointment book and schedule a session.

4) Stay open to the reality that this can happen anywhere at any time.

People at a party are all potential clients

“You have the right to work, but never to the fruit of work. You should never engage in action for the sake of reward, nor should you long for inaction. Perform work in this world, Arjuna, as a man established within himself—without selfish attachments, and alike in success and defeat. For yoga is perfect evenness of mind.”

The 192′ luxury yacht the Universe provided

—Krishna in Bhagavad-Gita

Yoga is more than bending and stretching in a class.  The lesson from Krishna (above) was driven home deeply to me one night when I arrived in Raleigh to teach at a holistic center.  On this night, their mailing list “workshopped out,” I walked into a very small turnout:  One solitary soul.

The student and center director asked if I wanted to cancel the class. I could have gone to the movies instead, but an inner voice said stay.  I figured out why by the end of the class.  My lone student learned volumes in her 2-hour private workshop on relationships.  For that, she thanked me profusely; the guy who cleans up popcorn and gunk from the movie theater’s floors wouldn’t have been so effusive.

What I realized quite deeply was that my job is to show up, whether it’s for one person or for one thousand people, as occurred just two weeks later when I delivered the keynote address at a convention in Atlanta.  When you’re a teacher and a coach, you teach and coach.  The Universe takes care of the results of those actions.

Oh, and about the Universe taking care of the fruits…the following night, I received an email from a mega-rich buddy in Australia.  In it, he invited my wife and me to be guests of his on a 2-week Caribbean cruise on a chartered private 192-foot yacht.  Since my job is to show up, I showed up on a luxury liner even though, on board, there were only a few people, just like I showed up for a class for one.